I believe the pathfinder will suit your needs well.... you're not the only one who has started looking at the 4runners, to end up looking at the pathy, simply because of budget.
The R50 pathfinder (96-2004) should be capable in stock form to get you through some minor offroad areas. If you end up looking into modifications, tires will get you far... from there it depends on whether you need the extra height of a lift, or protection (skidplates, sliders) - to drag your low rider over rocks offroad!
My pathy is a pig these days, but I did get close to what they advertise (16mpg hwy/18mpg city) when it was unmodified, and a few years younger.
You can definitely maintain the pathy yourself, many members here do so, and are willing to help if you run into issues. There is also a number of 'how to' threads to help you out.
You will notice some differences between the different years of the R50 pathfinder. Looks wise the 96-99 is what you are looking at, they updated the grille, hood, hatch & bumpers in 99.5. The 96-00 (someone correct me if I am wrong) has the 3.3 VG engine, and in 01 they changed over the 3.5 VQ engine. I understand the 3.5 has more power, but both are very reliable. Somewhere around that time they also introduced ALL MODE in addition to 2 hi, 4 hi & 4 low. (Again, someone correct me if I am wrong.)
If you are looking at one with the 3.3, make sure to ask about when the timing belt was done, as they do need to be serviced regularly.
Good look with your search!