k9sar Posted April 16, 2009 Share Posted April 16, 2009 (edited) ok... my youngest son is participating in a comedy night tonight and he needs some more jokes. They have to be clean enough for an 8-year old to tell (which leaves out 99% of the ones I know). anyone? example: Q. How do you catch a squirrel? A. You climb a tree and act like a nut. Q. How does Pezzy catch a squirrel? A. She just climbs a tree. Edited April 16, 2009 by k9sar Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ramon Posted April 16, 2009 Share Posted April 16, 2009 Q. How does Pezzy catch a squirrel? A. She just climbs a tree. LOL # What kind of bees hum and drop things? A fumble bee! # What did the bee say to the flower? Hello honey! # How does a queen bee get around her hive? She's throne! # What does the bee Santa Claus say? Ho hum hum! # What do bees chew? Bumble gum! # What does a bee say before it stings you? This is going to hurt me a lot more than it hurts you! # What's a bee-line? The shortest distance between two buzz-stops! # What is a baby bee? A little humbug! # Can bees fly in the rain? Not without their little yellow jackets! # Why did the bee started talking poetry? He was waxing lyrical! # What goes zzub, zzub? A bee flying backwards! # What are the cleverest bees? Spelling bees! # Why do bees buzz? Because they can't whistle! # What kind of bee can't be understood? A mumble bee! # What does a bee get at McDonalds? A humburger! # What kind of bee can keep an aeroplane dry? An aero-drone! # What do you call a bee who's had a spell put on him? He's bee-witched! # Where do bees keep their money? In a honey box! # Why did the bees go on strike? Because they wanted more honey and shorter working flowers! # What did the bee to the other bee in summer? Swarm here isn't it! # What is a bee's favorite classical music composer? Bee-thoven! # Who writes books for little bees? Bee-trix Potter! # What's a bees favorite novel? The Great Gats-bee! some times you just need to search on goolge and Ta-ra!!! http://www.comedy-zone.net/jokes/laugh/kids/kids7.htm or may be this one http://www.azkidsnet.com/JSknockjoke.htm Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
vengeful Posted April 16, 2009 Share Posted April 16, 2009 Why did the Tomato turn red? Because he saw the Salad dressing. Q. How do you make a Kleenex dance? A. You put a boogie in it. http://expeditionportal.com/forum/showthread.php?t=20581 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SC88Pathy Posted April 16, 2009 Share Posted April 16, 2009 What do you call a white whale? A bleached whale! (Note this joke only works if you laugh loudly and slowly while slapping your knee after you say the punchline) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
88pathoffroad Posted April 17, 2009 Share Posted April 17, 2009 Why isn't it a good idea to take Pokemons into the bathtub with you? Because they Pikachu! (peek at you) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beavis0076 Posted April 17, 2009 Share Posted April 17, 2009 The first joke I learned... and the only one I can remember.... what has 4 wheels and fly's? a garbage truck. lame.. but a classic Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cyril Posted April 17, 2009 Share Posted April 17, 2009 Why do old married men die earlier than their wifes . Because they want to . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
k9sar Posted April 17, 2009 Author Share Posted April 17, 2009 ok... he told the following: Q. Why do gorillas have big noses? A. because they have really big fingers Q. why do eskimos wash their laundry in tide? A. because it's too cold out-tide Q. Where do you find a cat with no legs? A. right where you left it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rod_b Posted April 17, 2009 Share Posted April 17, 2009 What do you call a fish with no eye...? A FSHHHHHHH What do you call a deer with no eye...? *shrugs shoulders* No-eye deer (no idea...get it?) What do you call a elephant mixed with a rhino...? *shrugs shoulders* eleph-ino (hell if I know... get it?) Not sure that last one is completely 8yo safe. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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