Mark

Agreed. The Tazer story was for entertainment value only. I'll pitch in shortly with one of my better braindead mishaps. I'm an electrician by trade, so I've had a couple of good shocks (and they're always funny) but I'm sure that I can do better. Let me ask my wife...

Hi Earth1. Welcome to our friendly boards. You mean as an avatar, right? Yeah, like MZX says, try resizing it. If you still have dramas, PM me and I'll take a look for you. :type: Cheers,

I found this by accident on another forum a while back. Now I've got a couple of good stupidity stories that I'll share in awhile, but for now, enjoy this guy's. It's pretty funny. I've deleted his name to protect his identity. In the original post, he hadn't done that. TAZER FUN Dear Friends, the mind is a wonderful thing; curiosity is not a wonderful thing. To much of one and not enough of the other in the wrong hands can be lethal in some cases. My wife is fond of saying that my last words on this earth will be something akin to, "hey y'all, hold my beer and watch this!" Well, I have outdone myself once again. No doubt you will see this true story chronicled in a LifeTime movie in the near future. Here goes............... Last weekend I spied something at Larry's Pistol and Pawn (Name of the establishment changed to protect the innocent) that tickled my fancy. (Note: Keep in mind that my "fancy" is easily tickled). I bought something really cool for for my wife. The occasion was our anniversary and I was looking for a little something extra for my sweet girl. What I came across was a 100,000-volt, pocket/purse-sized Tazer gun with a clip. For those of you who are not familiar with this product, it is a less-than-lethal stun gun with two metal prongs designed to incapacitate an assailant with a shock of high-voltage, low amperage electricity while you flee to safety. The effects are supposed to be short lived, with no long-term adverse affect on your assailant, but allowing you adequate time to retreat to safety. You simply jab the prongs into your 250 lb. Tattooed assailant, push the button, and it will render him a slobbering, goggle-eyed, muscle-twitching, whimpering, pencil-neck geek. If you've never seen one of these things in action, then you're truly missing out--way too cool! Long story short, I bought the device and brought it home. I loaded two triple-A batteries in the darn thing and pushed the button. Nothing! I was so disappointed. Upon reading the directions (we don't need no stinkin' directions), I found much to my chagrin that this particular model would not create an arch between the prongs. How disappointing! I do love fire for effect. I learned that, if I pushed the button, however, and pressed it against a metal surface that I'd get the blue arch of electricity darting back and forth between the prongs that I was so looking forward to. I did so. Awesome!!! Sparks, a blue arch of electricity, and a loud pop!!! Yipeeeeee . . I'm easily amused, just for your information, but I have yet to explain to the wife what that burn spot is on the face of her microwave. Okay, so I was home alone with this new toy, thinking to myself that it couldn't be all that bad with only two triple-A batteries, etc., etc. There I sat on my couch, my dog, Mini, looking on intently (trusting little soul), reading the directions (that would be me, not Mini) and thinking that I really needed to try this thing out on a flesh and blood target. I must admit I thought about zapping Mini for a fraction of a second and thought better of it. She is such a sweet dog, after all. But, if I was going to give this thing to the wife to protect herself against a mugger, I did want some assurance that it would work as advertised. Am I wrong? Was I wrong to think that? Seemed reasonable to me at the time... So, there I sat in a pair of shorts and a t-shirt, and BBT hat on my head, directions in one hand, Tazer in another. The directions said that a one-second burst would shock and disorient your assailant; a two-second burst was supposed to cause muscle spasms and a loss of bodily control; a three-second burst would purportedly make your assailant flop on the ground like a fish out of water. All the while I'm looking at this little device (measuring about 5" long, less than 3/4 inch in circumference, pretty cute really, and loaded with two itsy, bitsy triple-A batteries) thinking to myself, "no friggin' way!" Friggin' way--trust me, but I'm getting ahead of myself. What happened next is almost beyond description, but I'll do my best. Those of you who know me well have got a pretty good idea of what followed. I'm sitting there alone, Mini looking on with her head cocked to one side as if to say, "Don't do it, buddy," reasoning that a one-second burst from such a tiny lil' ole thing couldn't hurt all that bad (sound, rational thinking under the circumstances, wouldn't you agree?). I decided to give myself a one-second burst just for the hell of it. (Note: You know, a bad decision is like hindsight--always twenty-twenty. It is so obvious that it was a bad decision after the fact, even though it seemed so right at the time. Don't ya hate that?) I touched the prongs to my naked thigh, pushed the button, and HOLY **************! DAaaaauuuuuuMN!!! I'm pretty sure that Jessie Ventura ran in through the front door, picked me up out of that recliner, then body slammed me on the carpet over and over again. I vaguely recall waking up on my side in the fetal position, nipples on fire, testicles nowhere to be found, soaking wet, with my left arm tucked under my body in the oddest position. Mini was standing over me making funny sounds I had never heard before, licking my face, undoubtedly thinking to herself, "Do it again, do it again!" (Note: If you ever feel compelled to mug yourself with a Tazer, one note of caution. There is no such thing as a one-second burst when you zap yourself. You're not going to let go of that thing until it is dislodged from your hand by a violent thrashing about on the floor. Then, if you're lucky, you won't dislodge one of the prongs 1/4" deep in your thigh like yours truly.) SON-OF-A-***** that hurt! A minute or so later (I can't be sure, as time was a relative thing at this point), I collected my wits (what little I had left), sat up and surveyed the landscape. My hat was on the mantel of the fireplace. How did that get get there??? My triceps, right thigh and both titties were still twitching. My face felt like it had been shot up with Novocain, as my bottom lip weighed 88 lbs. give or take an ounce or two, I'm pretty sure. By the way, has anyone seen my testicles? I think they ran away. I'm offering a reward. Miss 'em . . . sure would like to get 'em back.

Yeah, no arguement from anybody there, I think. Silk-screen is better. I was only suggesting iron-on as a fallback in case 50 people wanted 50 different types of shirts...Thankfully, that doesn't seem to be happening.

Nice truck, really. Now you need to sell the Dakota and buy another Pathy, lift it and lock it. One for around town and one for the backcountry... Awesome.

I drive an R50. We got no manifold stud problems with R50s. With my prob, it was only at certain RPMs 'cuz it was only when I was accellerating a certain amount. Here's why: Y'know how the engine rocks slightly on it's mounts, toward the LHS when you apply the go-pedal? Well this torque-induced rock was bringing my LH Cat into contact with my crossmember. Hence the rattle. It was only at certain RPMs 'cuz when I wasn't accellerating hard enough, the cat wouldn't touch the crossmember and when I was accellerating hard, the cat was hard-up against the crossmember, not just vibrating against it. :o It's also worth trying a higher-octane gasoline and of course broken brackets, loose heat-shields etc are definitely worth checking out, also. -bounce- If all these things fail you, just try looking at your system and imagining what could touch what with some torque applied to the system. Worked for me. Good luck,

Horsepower is God. Tell everyone...

Why not just swap motors? My great frustration is that the VQ35 motor was never released in Oz. We only get the VG33 with auto for R50s. And no QX4. And no Xterra. I have a '96 and when it comes time to rebuild or replace my engine, I'm going to be looking at a VQ35 or a VG33 SC imported from the states. In the meantime, I'm thinking about turbocharging my VG33...

Hi Allan, Welcome to NPORA. This is a great board with some great people. You'll love it. For you in NZ, you should also check out the Pathfinders' Club of Australia at www.pcoa.org.au. We have NZ members. Happy Trails,

Congrats JRVANAS. Wish you all the best. With the wedding, too.*lol*

Sorry Slick. Just messin around. I'm sure there's a few folks on here with long hair. Male and female. I was just in a kooky mood that day...

I'm all for the grayscaled image on the black (as above) and the high-contrast on the white. I still like the idea of offering grey, red green and navy tees as well. I'll take the URL either way... Sorry I can't help with the screening at this end. It'd double the cost per tee to get them printed in Oz and shipped everywhere else. They probably need to be screened in the US or Canada. DSM, If I can help any more, let me know. I have a prog which is good at converting file-types for images. It has it's limitations but it's pretty good. Cheers,

I'm with you. Pocket tees are gonna be a problem 'cause they require a different design on the front. Polo shirts was always a dumb idea (mine-sorry).

It's Mr Jim's 'etch-a-sketch' truck. *lol* But I like the other pic better. 88's pics above would be awesome but I reckon it's more appropriate to use Jim's truck. Hey DSM, Dude I just did it in MS Paint. (The sketchy 'artistic' font was actually an accident but I loved the way it looked ) If you want it, I'll email you the file, as a bitmap or a jpeg. Whichever. Just PM me your email address. BTW, I love the new grey-on-black design. Everyone seems to have a different take on the type of tee shirts we use. Maybe we should set up a poll and ask people to vote on their fave. It means we'd all have to accept the majority rule, though. #1 Regular tee #2 Pocket tee #3 Polo Shirt #4 Long-sleeve tee If there's a complete failure to agree ( :gossip: -argue- :gossip: ), I'd propose we have the 'back' and 'front' logos printed as iron-on transfers . Then everyone could buy a couple of each and put them on their own favorite shirts and stuff. Besides, iron-on transfers would be considered retro and cool at the mo'. PS: Don't look at me to line up a printer. I live on the wrong continent for most of yall. Cheers :type:

Is this the longest thread on this forum, yet? Once it is, then we'll know we've got a good T-shirt. (Can you tell I'm a government employee).

Like this? Hmmmm. Yup. It does look better. Also It would go well on other color tees.

DSM Guy, Yeah, grey might be better on the black shirts. <EDIT> The pic above is really good <EDIT> From her last post, I think Slick likes the direction you're takin just fine. (I just couldn't resist a stab at humor). As per my earlier post (a couple above this one), here's a suggestion for the front logo. It's pretty close to your design. (Just imagine it's resized for the shirt).

I was reading this earlier post and had an idea. A long-hair-friendly version... (Sorry Slick, just foolin' around )

Dude, that's awesome for the back. Looks perfect. NPORA lettering, too. I'm thinking about a subdued red (not an eye-scorcher) and the same green as service-issue tees. (Fruit Of The Looms). I got a Colorado tee that color and it's my favorite tee. I actually like the "It's a Nissan thing...You Wouldn't Understand" slogan but two slogans on one shirt is too much. There needs to be only one and I reckon "Find Your Own Path" is a better slogan. I'm only against slogans that effectively say "My Pathfinder is golden and your Jeep is a POS" because I'm sure I'm not the only guy here who occasionally goes wheeling with Jeepers. (Actually, I admit it. I like Jeeps, but not as much as the mighty Pathfinders). My point is, though, when I need a hand with a recovery, I don't want to be wearing a tee that says to the other guy "your vehicle sucks". Maybe I'm crazy but I'm not that crazy... I'll repost shortly with a simple 'mountains' idea for the front.

Cool. Read the first post.

You're right about the white on dark. I'm just sayin' lets have some options. I'd suggest a dark logo on white, grey and red tees. And a white logo on navy, green and black tees. Or something similar. Cheers,

Why can't we have both? Is the printer going to charge extra or something? I prefer the design on the white shirt, but I don't want a white shirt. Can't we have a couple colors? If not, put me down for grey.

Unfortunately, your contact at ARBUSA is mistaken. The snorkel that Safari makes (the one in the link above) is specifically designed for the D22 Navara. (This is the Aussie version of the Frontier). They also sell the same unit for the Xterra and with some messing about, it fits the Xterra okay. It does NOT fit the Pathfinder, though. Some members of my local club have physically tried it. Firstly the angle of the pillar is too different from the Navara, secondly, the fender is a different shape and, thirdly, the radio aeriel on a Pathy is in the way of this snorkel. I've seen a pic of a late model R50 Pathy (badged as a Terrano) in New Zealand with a snorkel but it was an ex-Japan car and I'm told that they're structurally different. Besides, it was a pretty poor fit.

Crawl under the rear bumper of your rig and take a look at the diff. If there's an orange sticker on your rear diff that says "use LSD oil only", there's your answer. No sticker, open diff. Now, weight? Can't tell you off the top of my head. Anybody else?

DSM Guy, SOLD. I really like the second one. I'll buy one. :cool2: And I think your mountains look fine in the frontal design. I love the "find your own path" slogan Also it's cool that it's Mr Jim's truck in the pic. It should be. I want to be perfectly clear on one point, though. Slick and others are right. It would be foolish to have a shirt that sticks it to Jeeps. Murphy's Law says that you'd be wearing that shirt when you got stuck bad and the only help around was a club of guys passing by in Wranglers or Cherokees. :o With cameras.