Okay, driving normally the transmission in D, lever in N, i can switch the auto mode on and it does a 50/50 torque split between the wheels when required, but stays RWD when not needed. At a stop, transmission in N, i can pull the lever back and engage 4L and see the light on the dash and lock auto enabled, and then swithc back to D. In all other scenarios i can push the lever a bit forward but not enough for it to engage anything or remain forward it just comes back to N (wigglin side to side) with no dash lights. My shift is Top H, Middle N (wiggle side to side), bottom 4L. engine is always running when attempting to switch.
Here is a photo with the chart from Infiniti showing optimal settings and my shifter and such. There is a possibility N is the same as H and im just dumb but i dont think so?
https://www.dropbox.com/s/91z835l54vogv86/Photo 2018-09-14%2C 3 32 42 PM.jpg?dl=0