Sounds like an unusual issue indeed, 5100's are extremely common in the Toyota communities I'm involved in and failures are few and far between, with the only ones I've seen being the end snapping off due to extreme abuse. I wouldn't take unusual premature bushing wear as a reason to jump up in cost on shocks, although if you want longer ones anyways it's a good excuse haha. That's also extremely like Bilstein to deny warranty, from what I've seen it seems that they will only warranty things when they're done precisely as they specify, although that does make sense I suppose.
Personally I think the amount of rake you have is very reasonable and looks good, is the trunk empty in the pic? A couple toolboxes and/or camping gear when on trips should get it level I'd imagine, so if it sits a bit uneven day to day but sits right in the woods, sounds like a good setup to me.